Tuesday, December 29, 2009

I am sick

No, not only in the physical sense. I am sick. Like a dying dog. But THIS makes me sick to my stomach. I am ashamed to be from a country where women and girls are treated no better than cattle. I am afraid to R2I because I have two daughters and I do not want them to be touched by even the shadows of something like this. I do understand that such things don't happen as much any more. Or don't they? Maybe they still happen all the time all over the place. We just don't get to hear about them because they are squashed by the powerful or never uttered by the powerless.

I found it extremely hard to read the entire Wikipedia article. My gut started revolting, my skin started crawling almost halfway through it. I couldn't read any more. But I forced myself to read it. Please do follow the link I have provided above and read the entire article. Then come back and tell me - is there a solution to this??

I am copy-pasting the article from Wikipedia here too. Such blatant misuse of power, such shameless support of the guilty and such torture of the innocent! I feel like saying "It happens only in...." but I can't bring myself to say it because I know there are good things happening too. But the fact remains that India has a long way to go where fair treatment of the powerless, and fair justice TO the powerful is concerned. It is SICKENING!!

Here is the Wikipedia article:

Background

Ruchika, the daughter of SC Girhotra, a bank manager, was a student in Class X A (Batch of 1991) at Sacred Heart School for Girls in Chandigarh, and a budding tennis player. Her mother passed away when she was ten years old.[3][4]

She, along with her friend Aradhana Parkash, was enrolled as a trainee at the Haryana Lawn Tennis Association (HLTA). A few young girls played in tennis court situated in Panchkula's Sector 6. [5]

Aradhana's parents Anand and Madhu Parkash fought the long legal battle for justice for Ruchika, attending over 400 hearings, after Ruchika's father and brother had to leave Panchkula due to harrasment. Advocates Pankaj Bhardwaj and Meet Malhotra fought the case for free since 1996.[5]

Born in 1941 and a 1966-Batch IPS officer of the Haryana Cadre, Rathore was on deputation to Bhakhra Beas Management Board as Director, Vigilance and Security, when he molested Ruchika. He was the founding president of the Haryana Lawn Tennis Association and it's office was in the garage of his house, at 469, Sector-6, Panchkula. The house was then under construction. Rathore continues to reside there.[6]

Rathore's wife Abha is an advocate. She defended his case from the beginning.[5] She practises law in Panchkula and Chandigarh from her office in Sector 6, Panchkula.[7] Ajay Jain was counsel for Rathore while the case was before courts in Ambala.[8]

Rathore's daughter Priyanjali was Ruchika's classmate. She is now a practising lawyer.[3] His son Rahul also practises law at the Punjab and Haryana High Court with Rahul Rathore Advocates.[9]

[edit]Molestation

On August 11, 1990, Rathore visited Ruchika's house and met her father SC Girhotra. He told him that he should not send Ruchika abroad to Canada as the father planned, as she was a very promising player and that he would arrange special coaching for her. The senior cop also asked Girhotra to send Ruchika to his office the next day at 12 noon in connection with this.

On August 12 (Sunday), Ruchika, along with her friend Aradhana, went to play at the lawn tennis court and met Rathore in his office (in the garage of his house).

On seeing both of them, Rathore asked Aradhana to call the tennis coach (Mr.Thomas) to his room.

Aradhana left, and Rathore was alone with Ruchika. He immediately grabbed her hand and waist and pressed his body against hers. Ruchika tried to push him away, but he continued molesting her.[10]

But Aradhana returned half way and witnessed what was going on. On seeing her, Rathore released Ruchika and fell back in his chair. He then asked Aradhana to go out of his room and personally bring the coach with her. When she refused, Rathore rebuked Aradhana loudly, asking her to bring the coach. He insisted that Ruchika stayed in his room, but she managed to run out.[10]

Ruchika told Aradhana everything that happened. Both girls did not tell anybody at first. The next day, they did not go to play tennis. The following day, August 14, they did play till 6:30 pm. As they were leaving, the ball picker, Patloo, told them Rathore had called them to his office.[10] It was then that Ruchika and Anuradha decided to tell their parents about the incident.

Following this, Panchkula residents, mostly parents of tennis players, gathered at the residence of Anand Prakash, father of Ruchika's friend Aradhana, and decided that some strong action must be taken by way of bringing up the matter with higher authorities.

They could not contact either CM Hukum Singh or Home Minister Sampat Singh, but met Home Secretary J K Duggal, who, on August 17, 1990, discussed the matter with the Home Minister and asked DGP Ram Rakshpal Singh to investigate.[11][12]

Rathore allegedly paid some residents of Rajiv Colony (a slum) in Panchkula and also garnered the support of people from his community in Naraingarh, Ambala district. They staged dharnas outside the office and home of RR Singh.[13]

On September 3, 1990, the inquiry report submitted by RR Singh to Home Secretary J K Duggal indicted Rathore.[11] It recommended that an FIR be filed immediately against Rathore. Duggal forwarded the report to the Home Minister Sampat Singh, who failed to forward it to the Chief Minister for necessary action.[14] The Home Secretary who replace Duggal never followed up on the report.[14]

The report also revealed that an ex-MLA, Jagjeet Singh Tikka, organised a large group of men to shout slogans in front of Ruchika's house and harass her family.[14] Rathore enjoyed the patronage of both the Hukam Singh and the Om Prakash Chautala governments. [15][16][17]

Instead of filing an FIR as recommended by the report, the government preferred departmental action, issuing a chargesheet against the accused on May 28, 1991. However, the legal remembrancer (who gives opinion to the government on legal issues) R K Nehru in his opinion in 1992 suggested that state government was not competent to issue the chargesheet, adding it would be quite legal and proper to get the FIR registered. Then, the CM Bhajan Lal's office had referred the case to chief secretary for advice. But nothing happened finally.[11]

[edit]Harrasment

On September 20, 1990, two weeks after the inquiry indicted Rathore, Ruchika was expelled from her school, Sacred Heart School for Girls, in Sector 26, Chandigarh. Ruchika had studied there from Class I. The school actively plotted against Ruchika. The official reason for her expulsion was non-payment of fees. The school had actually refused to accept her fees. No notice was given to Ruchika for non-payment of fees, as is the school's normal procedure. The school's brochure states that non-payment of fees can only lead to being disallowed to take exams. It is not grounds for expulsion.[18][19] A reason of alleged 'indiscipline' was also put forward by the school. This was later used by Rathore's lawyers to question Ruchika's character.

After her expulsion, Ruchika confined herself indoors. Whenever she went out she was followed and abused by Rathore's henchmen.[20]

False cases of theft, murder and civil defamation were filed against Ruchika's father and her 10 year old brother Ashu. Five theft cases against Ashu were registered by Sub-Inspector Prem Dutt and one case by Assistant Sub-Inspector Sewa Singh.[21] The cases were filed when KP Singh was the superintendent of police, Ambala. Singh is now the Inspector General of police in Haryana.[14]

Cases were filed against Anand Parkash, his wife Madhu, and their minor daughter Aradhana.

Anand Parkash worked as Chief Engineer in the Haryana State Agriculture Marketing Board and had a spotless record until this incident. Rathore then instigated more than 20 complaints against him. He was suspended from his job for some time and demoted to Superintendent Engineer. He was eventually given premature retirement. He did, however, challenge the government orders and was given relief by the court and cleared of all the complaints.[22][23]

Aradhana, who is the sole witness in the molestation case, had ten civil cases filed against her by Rathore. She received abusive and threatening calls for months until she got married and left for Australia.[22] Pankaj Bhardwaj, the lawyer who took up Ruchika's case, was slapped with two court cases by Rathore -a defamation case and a case for compensation.[22]

When Rathore was heading the vigilance team in the Haryana State Electricity Board (HSEB), he sent special teams from Bhiwani to raid houses of several of his complainants.[22] Rathore also filed two cases against each of the journalists who had reported on the matter - one criminal and another civil - demanding compensation of Rs. 1 crore each.[22]

On September 23 1993, Ruchika's then 13 year old brother, Ashu, was picked up in the market place near his house by police in plain clothes. They drove him in a jeep to the Crime Investigation Agency (CIA) Staff Office in Mansa Devi. There, he was tortured by Sub-Inspector Prem Dutt and Assistant Sub-Inspector Sewa Singh.[21]

His hands were tied on his back and he was made to bend. His feet were tied with a weight. He was kept in this uncomfortable position for an extended period of time.[20]

After some time, Rathore also arrived there. Ashu was then tortured further. A roller, referred to by the police as "Mussal', was rolled on his legs and thighs after four constables boarded the roller. [24] [25]

While still in illegal confinement, Ashu was taken to his house and beaten mercilessly in front of Ruchika by Rathore. Rathore then threatened her, saying that if she did not take back the complaint, her father, and then she herself, would face the same fate. [26][27] Ashu was paraded in handcuffs in his neighbourhood.[28]

Ashu was picked up again on November 11, 1993. He was tortured again and was unable to walk due to the beatings. He was not given food or water for days at a stretch and was beaten mercilessly. He was repeatedly told to convince his sister to withdraw her complaint.[28] He was allegedly forced to sign on blank papers, which were used by the police to show his "confessions" that he stole 11 cars.[24] He would not be released until after his sister's suicide.[24]

No charges were ever framed in any of these cases filed against Ashu.[14]

The Panchkula Chief Judicial Magistrate exonerated Ashu in 1997, saying he had "no hesitation to pinpoint that nothing is on record to prima facie indict the accused" and that the disclosure statement made by the main accused, Gajinder Singh, was "just wastepaper".[29]

Gajinder Singh, a resident of Bihar, had been arrested by the Panchkula Police for a car theft and police claimed he had named Ashu and Sandeep as his accomplices. Singh later absconded and has been named a proclaimed offender.[30][29]

The Girhotra's one-kanal bungalow in Sector 6 Panchkula was forcibly sold to a lawyer working for Rathore.[26] Ruchika's father was suspended from his job as bank manager, on charges of alleged corruption, after coercion from Rathore.[22] They moved to the outskirts of Simla, and had to take up earth filling to make a living.[31]

[edit]Suicide

On December 28, 1993, with her innocent brother still in jail, Ruchika consumed poison. She died the next day.

Perversely, Rathore threw a party that night to celebrate. [32]

Ruchika's father Subash was forced by the police to sign blank sheets of paper in order to take possession of Ruchika's body. The fact that his son Ashu was still in illegal police detention was also used to coerce him. The blank papers were later used by the police to establish that the family had accepted Ruchika's forged autopsy report. [33] The day Ruchika committed suicide, Ashu was unconscious in CIA lock-up. He had been stripped naked and beaten the previous night by drunk policemen. He was brought back to his house, still unconscious, after her last rites were over.[25][24]

Rathore tried to hide the fact that Ruchika's death was suicide, since an FIR would need to be lodged. He doctored the inquest report, changing the cause of death to consumption of slimming pills. The police coerced Ruchika's nanny to pose as his mother and record a statement saying her "daughter" died from consuming medicines to reduce weight.[4]

However, the doctors' report clearly said she had died after consuming a chloro-compound, used for insecticides.[34]

In the inquest and the postmortem report, the name Ruchika was replaced with her nickname Ruby, and her father's name was changed to Subhash Chander Khatri.[34] This was to ensure that anyone reading the report would not know it pertains to Ruchika.[35]

The government closed the case filed against Rathore less than a week after her death.[36]

Unable to bear the harassment, her family moved out of Chandigarh.[2]

Just a few months later, Rathore was promoted to additional DGP in November 1994, when Bhajan Lal was chief minister. [17]

[edit]Case Dropped

In November 1994, Rathore was promoted. No action was taken on the inquiry report. Anand Parkash started trying to get copy of the report. After 3 years, he finally obtained it in 1997, and in November, moved the Punjab and Haryana High Court. On August 21, 1998, the High Court directed the CBI to conduct an inquiry.

In Oct 1999, the INLD government led by Om Prakash Chautala made Rathore the police chief (DGP) of the state.[17] His name was even recommended for a President's Police Medal For Distinguished Service by the same government in November 1999.[37] Birbal Das Dhalia, who as then Home Secretary, defended the decision, saying there was no chargesheet.[38]

[edit]Ashu Case

Ashu's case had reached before the HC following suo motu cognizance taken of a media report highlighting his plight[32], by justice Mehtab Singh Gill on December 12, 2000. The then chief justice had referred the matter before a division bench comprising justice N K Sodhi and justice N K Sood.[34]

While deposing before the division bench, Ashu stated that he had undergone inhuman treatment at the instance of Rathore and the Panchkula police. This was his first statement since the family was forced to leave Panchkula. At the time of making the statement, the family was living in Sector-2, New Shimla.[34]

On December 13, 2000, the division bench voiced support for compensation to Ashu for the harassment caused to him at the hands of Panchkula police. [30]

Rathore filed an affidavit in 2001 denying the allegations.[20]

The HC then referred the inquiry to sessions judge Patiala. On September 3, 2002, Ashu detailed the torture he was put through to a Patiala Sessions Court.[20][34]

But Rathore approached the Supreme Court and got the high court order quashed on technical grounds.[25]

[edit]CBI Enquiry

On August 21, 1998, the Punjab and Haryana High Court directed the CBI to conduct an inquiry.

The High Court had ordered completion of investigation of the case and filing of chargesheet expeditiously, "preferably within six months".[39]However, more than a year passed before the CBI filed a chargesheet.[39]

On November 16, 2000, the CBI filed a charge sheet against Rathore.

Despite the CBI chargesheet, the Chautala government allowed Rathore to continue as police chief. [17]

The case was put to hearing in the CBI special court in Ambala from November 17. The hearings in Ambala would continue till May 2006.[17]

The chargesheet was filed only under Section 354 (molestation). Abetment to suicide was inexplicably not included.[39]

On October 8, 2001, counsel for Anand Parkash moved an application demanding the addition of abetment to suicide (306 of IPC) against Rathore. In a scathing judgment on October 23, 2001, Special CBI Judge Jagdev Singh Dhanjal demanded that the offence be added. In his 21-page judgement, the CBI Judge underlined witness statements, including those of Ruchika's father, Anand Parkash, friend Aradhana and others in adding Section 306 (abetment) of IPC against Rathore.[40][41]

However, in February 2002, Justice K C Kathuria of the Punjab and Haryana High Court dismissed the CBI court's decision to register an FIR against Rathore for abetment to suicide, claiming the lack of a complaint regarding harassment. [30] Kathuria is now the President of the Haryana State Consumer Disputes Redressal Commission.

Incredibly, after filing the chargesheet in 2000, the CBI took 7 years to record evidence from 16 prosecution witnesses. On the other hand, the defence counsel took nine months to complete examination of 13 out of the total 17 witnesses.[39]

Rathore tried to use his influence with the CBI. R M Singh, who was CBI Joint Director in 1998 and retired in 2001, said Rathore was tracking the case. Once the file arrived at Singh's desk, he started getting frequent visits to his office from Rathore. Rathore visited multiple times in 1998, trying to influence the CBI to clear him on all charges. Rathore had learnt that Singh was constructing a house in Gurgaon, and offered to provide building materials and other assistance. Singh also found out that Rathore had also approaced the Investigating Officer for the case, Rajesh Ranjan, CBI's Deputy Superintendent of Police. When he failed to influence the officers, Rathore had the case transferred. Rathore enjoyed access to all levels of the CBI since he was DGP.[32][42]

Ruchika's was one of the few cases heard in three subordinate courts of three different states: Haryana, Punjab and Chandigarh - apart from one in high court and the Supreme Court as well. Around 15 applications were accepted in Punjab and Haryana High Court on behalf of Rathore, a strategy meant to delay the case.[43]

For example, on January 23, 2006, Rathore moved an application demanding transfer of trial from Ambala CBI Special Magistrate Ritu Garg to any other court. The application was moved when evidence of only two prosecution witnesses was remaining. The grounds claimed was that Rathore knew Ritu's father and that Rathore's son Rahul was a friendly with Ritu.[44] Surprisingly, the CBI didn't object. In his the reply filed in February 2006, S S Lakra, the then Additional Superintendent of Police, New Delhi, said he did not object to the transfer, allegedly so the case would "conclude expeditiously". The case was then transferred to Patiala.[44] Again when the case was at the last stage, Rathore accused the then Special CBI Judge, Patiala, Rakesh Kumar Gupta of overawing the defence witnesses and scolding Rathore. This time also the CBI did not object to transferring of the case to Chandigarh.[44]

Rathore also used other technical grounds like demanding that the trial be videographed to cause more delays. Ironically, he later claimed that the long delays were grounds for a reduced sentence.[45]

On November 5, 2009, the case was transferred from the Ambala court to CBI Chandigarh. In December, the court closed all final arguments, gave its verdict and on December 21, special judge J.S. Sidhu[46] pronounced a six-month jail sentence and a fine of Rs 1000 to Rathore.[47] He was granted bail minutes after the sentencing, after furnishing a bail bond of Rs.10,000. Rathore also said he would appeal against the verdict.[24]

[edit]Impact

The case was brought up for debate in Parliament. "After 19 years, the criminal has been found guilty but all he got as punishment was 6 months in prison. Within 10 minutes of conviction, he was out on bail. Is it not a shame for all of us?" asked CPI (M) leader Brinda Karat.[48]

Former Haryana CM Om Prakash Chautala, when asked about the case, dismissed it as a "frivolous issue". It was during his rule that Rathore was promoted to police chief (DGP) for Haryana. After the public outcry over the case, Chautala backtracked and accused the courts and the ruling Congress Government in Haryana of "letting Rathore off with a light punishment."[49] Ruchika's father has blamed Chautala for actively supporting Rathore as he harassed his family.[50]

Aradhna Parkash has started a signature drive to reopen the case. The email address is 'joinaradhna4ruchika at gmail.com'.[51]

Friday, December 18, 2009

A Class A-holes or just idiots?

Say, you launch a product in a country. And then bar the residents of that country from entering the showroom. Which business school teaches this kind of idiocy?

Mr. Anindo Mukherji, Managing Director of General Mills India has issued a media statement saying the posters (declaring only holders of international passports will be allowed access) were put up to create an aura around the brand and that they regret it very much. Well, they should! What did they think? Indians are still living in the British Raj era and will take any insult thrown their way? Idiots!!


Thursday, December 10, 2009

What do you do?

When someone won't listen to you?

You are, say, putting up a "car port" (tent) with them for one of your cars. Your region has some really unpredictable weather patterns. You are worried that some day the tent will just get blown away by the strong winds that sometimes invade with all ferocity. Your concerns are pooh-poohed away. Support is sought from your mom and the BOTH of them shoot down your suggestion to nail down the pegs of the tent.

Then, say, one day a strong wind does blow the tent 20 feet into a tree. What do you do?

You help them pull the tent back in the blistering winds. Then you say "I told you so!" Over and over. Then come inside and blog about it.

That's what you do :D (And then you even email them this post :P:P)

Friday, December 04, 2009

Sometimes, when I don't have anything better to do

I check the spam folder in my email. And find nuggets like this one:

Hello! You are welcomed by marriage agency. To you the young girl looking the partner in life has shown interest. We send you a photo of this girl, and as her email the address *insert fake email address here which will actually lead you to a porn site or something*. She will wait for your letter. We guarantee confidentiality of correspondence. 

Yours faithfully marriage agency.

So, what say? Should I go get married?

Thursday, November 26, 2009

A true global integration

is when Indians celebrate Thanksgiving (an American Holiday) by getting together and eating Chinese food!

Yep - the menu for this year's Thanksgiving Dinner hosted by the Kays is:

Appetizers: Sweet corn soup, spring rolls.

Main Course: Veg Fried rice, Chow Mein, Veg Manchurian and Chili Paneer

Dessert: Cheesecake

Happy Thanksgiving all!!


Wednesday, November 25, 2009

The rebellious teenager

Mommy(singing): Where is Ninni? Where is Ninni? Here I am! Here I am! How are you today Ninni? Fine thank you! Fine thank you!

Ninni(grumpily): NO fine thankyou!!

Saturday, November 21, 2009

We are all the same

Outside M's daycare:

I saw a hunky dad in long hair, with a car seat in his hand, coming out of the daycare and I went "Oooooooooooooooh!!" *wolf whistle* (the wolf whistle was inside my mind)

Inside the daycare (as I walked in with M):

One of the daycare providers came out of a room with an infant in her arms and asked another "Did you SEE his dad??!!" and the other one went "Oh yeah!!" *wolf whistle* (The wolf whistle, I am sure, was inside their minds. It was definitely on their faces :P)

LOL!!

Note: J, I still love you and ONLY you. This was just one incident where my inner, primitive woman came out :P:P:P

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

I think...

...it is time I stopped blaming various elements from my past for ruining my chances at having a decent career and took charge of my future. What say?

But how?

I know I need more certifications (due to the lack of professional experience) to beef up my resume. I even attended a training in mid-august after which I could have easily cleared the certification for that technology but right around that time I got a job offer and had to join that job in quite a haste. I just got one week to put my affairs in order - finding childcare being the main one. Now my routine is hectic and I barely get enough time to cook, clean (some) and do some exercise. The exercise, I feel, is the most important and most required part of my routine. I need to get back in shape if I don't want to land with various ailments as I get older. My biggest fear is that I will develop diabetes if I don't lose some weight fast.

This is my general routine:

6.30 am - wake up. Get ready for work. Pack lunches etc.
7.55 am - Out the door. Drop S off at her school then drop M off at her daycare.
8.30 am - Arrive at work.
8.30 am - 5.30 pm - Work, work, work (and exchange a few emails with some friends)
5.30 pm - Leave for home.
6.15 pm - Get home. Start cooking dinner. Make and pack lunches for the next day.
8.00 pm - Go to the gym. This is an iffy part. Some days I can't manage to go.
9.15 pm - Get back from gym. Eat dinner. Watch a TV program (or half). Clean up the kitchen. Make list for the next day - what to pack in whose lunch bag etc.
10.30 pm - Take a shower. Check email. Blog. Clean up a little around the house if I am feeling up to it.
11.30 pm - Get in bed.

Repeat Monday to Friday.

Now the only time I can take out to study is the hour long lunch break that I get at work. Will try that. It is like a vicious circle - I can't get work if I don't study and I can't study if I work. And I can study only if I am earning something to be able to pay the tuition. What a mess!!

Monday, November 16, 2009

Privacy shrivacy

When I hear parents of young (even VERY young) kids talking about their kids' privacy, I choke on my own spit. I get the concept of privacy for certain things - like privacy when they use the bathroom. But there ARE situations when a parent might have to invade his/her kid's privacy. If I were afraid my daughter were falling in with the wrong crowd or were using drugs, I wouldn't hesitate in snooping around. To me, it is more important to have her well and alive on this earth somewhere, than to have her living with me and/or on talking terms with me. If I invaded her privacy for a valid reason, she found out and got upset with me, I'd live with that. But to suspect, not do anything and then to find out she made a huge mistake - I wouldn't be able to live with that. And of course, I am going to resort to snooping only when I have exhausted all other avenues of talking with her or having some other trusted adult talk to her. To me, that is love. Tough love.

So, what would you do?

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

What is the point..

... of keeping the treadmill at full incline and then walking as you literally hang on to the handrails? And of almost doubling over with effort because the weights you are training with are too heavy for you to lift?

The mistaken assumption of "more is better" I suppose.

Monday, November 09, 2009

Priorities

Edited to add J's comments at the end

Gas for driving 220 miles @ $2.27/gal (10 gallons): $22.70
Grocery for the next 4 months: $286.58
Bags carried from car to kitchen: 17
Hours spent driving from and to home: 3.75
Friends met: 2

Getting a haircut you will love to live with for the next 4 months: Priceless!!

Here is what J had to say about this post-

Gas price @2:79/gal (10 gallons): $27.90

Haircut : Looks good J

Sunday, November 08, 2009

When you can't think of anything at all

Post Pictures!!

He he! Couldn't resist this one! She is pushing a weighing scale in front of her.




Off to middle school we go! S' first day of middle school.



Ninja! M wearing her sister's swimming cap.



In lehenga on Ganesh Chaturthi, pretty soon after her mundan.



Same dress, same day, different pose.


Saturday, November 07, 2009

Simple suggestions

You tell your wife you like long hair?
Grow yours, by all means!

You want you and your wife to have the same last name?
Sure, take up her name!

You like pierced noses?
Get your own done.

Just some simple suggestions!

Friday, November 06, 2009

A fleeting moment

...etched in her mind. 

They are walking back from the restaurant, after having had lunch together. She shivers. There is a cold breeze. She has her coat in her hands, but was too lazy to put it on. He chides her for not putting it on, then extends his arm around her shoulder and shields her as best as he can. Who'll say it is soon going to be 14 years?

A fleeting, tender moment.

Thursday, November 05, 2009

From "I lolue" to "GO AWAY!!"

We have come a long way. Now not-a-baby-anymore-M wants only her dad. Mom is under the "go away" status. Didi, who used to be under that status is now exempt from it because, frankly, what do you do when you want to avoid mom at all costs and dad is, say, in the bathroom? You go to didi, that's what!!

I don't know whether to be sad or upset at this. So I choose to laugh at it!

Wednesday, November 04, 2009

A recipe for disaster

I went to a women's clothing two nights ago. While I was standing at the counter to pay for my purchases, a sales associate returned with a driver's license and "returned" it to me. It belonged to the woman who paid for her purchases before me - she must have applied for their store credit card because that is when they ask for your social security number and driver's license (to complete the application). She had drifted away to look at some other things. Now, if I had even a little bit of criminal tendencies, this was a great chance for me to make away with that driver's license. Instead I refused to take the card saying it didn't belong to me. The woman whom the card belonged to probably didn't realize how lucky she was that I wasn't someone looking for easy money/credit. I could have simply walked away with the card and used it to apply for new credit cards or open new bank accounts or possibly empty out her current ones. I would have been at least one step closer to doing all that.

I always follow one rule when handing out a credit card or an ID card to someone - I keep my wallet open in my hands until I get my card back. It has become a habit now. If I have my wallet open in my hands (while waiting for someone to finish processing some transaction), it means they have my card. Recently this habit saved me from losing my older daughter's Insurance card. I had given it to the receptionist at a doctor's office to copy for their records. She got caught up with other work while I waited and only after I reminded her did she remember to return it to me.

So a little bit of gyaan in today's world full of identity theft risk - never leave your ID card unattended in another person's hands. DO NOT drift away while someone else is taking down your information from it.

Tuesday, November 03, 2009

To elaborate on my last post

No, I am not turning my blog into a Quotable Quotes repository. One - I was testing the post by email functionality of blogger. Two - I really had that thought in my mind for the last few days.

I have been through some emotionally tough times recently. Nothing drastic, just something that was a culmination of the medicines I am taking for various conditions and events that have happened in the last year. I had been feeling very down in the dumps, felt like something was pulling me down deep and keeping me there. Please notice the past tense in the previous sentences. I don't feel that way any more. Not all the time anyway. And THAT makes all the difference in my outlook on my life.

A few months ago, I was so blue I could find NOTHING in my life that was worth living for. I was, even in my darkest times, thankful for what I have - a wonderful husband, two beautiful miracles of kids, a great family including my mom and brother who care a lot about me. But even these positives couldn't overcome the shadows on my mind.

About three months ago, I stopped taking one medication that was adding to the depression - the progesterone. Slowly my emotional condition started to improve. Now I am at a point where I still sometimes get blue but those times are far and few between. And not as intense. While earlier I would get all engulfed into the darkness, now I skillfully tread the waters until the darkness dissolves. I had begun thinking of myself as a complete and utter loser. Now I think I will be a loser only if I give up. I won't. And that makes for the previous random thought.

The BIG difference between winners and losers is

that winners don't give up.

Sunday, November 01, 2009

One thing that bugs me about cooking shows

is that the cooks/chefs featured in them don't think twice about tasting a dish they are cooking and then dipping the spoon back in it. Ugh!! There is this concept of food getting "jootha" in India that I cannot explain properly in English. I don't know if there is an equivalent word in English. When someone eats from a plate, or tastes with a spoon, it is considered "jootha". Now if you dip that spoon back into the pan/pot, the entire pot is considered jootha. Makes sense to me too - when you put a spoon in your mouth, you transfer germs from your mouth/saliva to the spoon and when that spoon is dipped back into the pot, the germs are then transferred to the entire contents. I just don't think it is very hygienic.

Another thing I have noticed in some shows is that the chefs don't wash their hands properly even after handling meat. Another hygiene alarm. I don't think I'd be able to eat in their kitchen with a carefree mind!

Saturday, October 31, 2009

Living it up...

..at the Great Wolf Lodge in Pocono Mountains, Pennsylvania. This trip is a birthday present for S but much needed for the entire family. Baby M (who isn't a baby any more, by the way) can't stop skipping. S gets her own room den. We have rented the Wolf Den Suite. What fun!! Photos to follow.

Happy Halloween everyone!!

Happy Birthday mah dahlin'

11 years ago, at this moment (in India) I was in the labor room. Eagerly straining waiting to see if I'll get my wish - a baby girl. I did!

Happy birthday darling. May you live to be... a hundred and three... and many more, many more....

Saturday, October 03, 2009

I still miss you...

It's been a year, but is there a limit on mourning? Or a way of doing it? I have been quite easy on the mourning rituals. Celebrated some occasions (S' birthday, J's 40th birthday, M's birthday) and didn't celebrate others. I went with what my gut told me - if I felt sad upon thinking of celebrating an occasion, I didn't. Mostly because it was connected to you somehow. Like Diwali and Holi. You enjoyed celebrating them. I didn't feel like celebrating them with you gone. Even now, when the year is up, I am ambiguous about celebrating them. They probably won't be the same now. When you were alive, even with you thousands of miles away, festivals felt like festivals. I have often wondered how, when a loved one leaves us, the whole world seems empty. It didn't matter that you lived thousands of miles away and I got to see you only once every two years. You were here. Now you aren't. And the world seems empty.

On the positive side, I am not so afraid of dying anymore. I believe I will meet you when I do. And any place that you are in, couldn't be scary, right?? So I am not afraid of the other side any more.

I miss you.

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

You say to-may-to, I say....

po-to-to! No matter how hard mommy tries to get me to say to-may-to, I still call it po-to-to. We'll see who gives up first. Don't tell mom, but I think she is secretly enjoying this mispronunciation because I don't see her making that much of an effort to correct me either. Ah, but I take after her in stubborn-ness too. Maybe that is why she has kinda sorta given up on teaching me such things. Or maybe she thinks I am too little to be burdened with formal learning. I'll show her!! I already went ahead and learned to count from 1 to 8 all on my own. That should teach her not to underestimate me!

I know she stopped typing updates on me. Lazy bum!! Nothing gets done around here if I am not around to do it. That reminds me - mom and dad have been on my case recently. They just don't get it that I need to do everything by myself. Even if I can't actually do it. Like, opening a door. I haven't quite mastered the act of twisting the door knob to open the door but who wants to worry about silly details anyway?? I want to open the door myself and that is final!! Now, if you try to be helpful and open the door for me, I am NOT going to be responsible for your eardrums. OKAY? Okay!

By the way, don't you say anything about my hair - or lack thereof. Mom and dad are into things like mundan-shundan. Sigh!! I do miss my silken curly locks and that is why I used to pester nani to make my "choti". She was the only one who could get it done. Mom dad keep telling me I need longer hair for a choti but nani never made a fuss. She would strategically place a rubber band on my head and if I walked carefully, the rubber band stayed on my head and I looked really pretty. Once nani even put two rubber bands around my ears and boy, did I look pretty!!!!

Speaking of nani - she is THE BEST PLAYMATE ever!! And the best copy-catter! We played in the backyard together and I will forever cherish those times. I usually took the lead (you see, nani is a little shy) and showed her what to do and how to do it. She would promptly follow me. She is a quick learner for sure! We made up this game... well, actually I did. See, there is a rock in the far corner of our backyard. I made up a game - I would climb that rock and make weird faces and sing incomprehensible songs. The rule was that nani had to copy me exactly. She usually did, and even if she didn't who cared!! We had fun and that was all we cared about. Now nani has gone back to "Indie" :(( I miss her terribly even though I don't exactly know that that is what's happening to me. All I know is I feel weird and kinda cranky. I do sometimes ask about her but generally I busy myself with other things. She is back in Indie, I hear, and keeps asking about me. But so far I have refused to talk to her because I am mad at her for leaving. I suggested so many alternatives to her but she didn't listen. Every time the topic of her going back to Indie came up I helpfully told her "Roti banao" (make roti) or "neechey jao" (go downstairs - to play on the computer) - but she didn't listen to me :( Anyway - I understand. I just choose to be cranky about it.

Uh-oh!! Gotta go! The phone was ringing and mom picked it up without waiting for me to bring it to her. Gotta go throw a tantrum! Toodles!!

(Guess who? ?)

Sunday, August 16, 2009

Are we teaching our kids only half the lesson?

Scene from about 10 years ago:

A little boy, about 4 years old, is sitting in the kitchen with a glass of milk in front of him on the dining table. His young aunt is sitting there too, with her glass of milk in front of her. They are about to see who can drink their milk fastest. Aunt picks up her glass and starts sipping her milk. The little boy protests "You can't drink faster than me! I want to be first". Aunt replies "So why don't you start drinking your milk?" The boy doesn't want to. Aunt says "You have to drink faster to be first. I am not going to slow down just so you can win." The little boy doesn't get this logic. Till now everyone he has competed with, has lost to him. They have even pretended to cry upon losing. The aunt would have none of that. You either drink fast or you lose. If you sit with your glass of milk in front of you, I'm not going to sit with mine waiting for you to begin! The boy cries. His mom is fuming and eventually tells him "Okay you can defeat me in milk-drinking competition. Let kaki (aunt) drink her milk". Matter ends.

I was that heartless aunt. J's nephew, the little boy. I was trying to teach him that in order to win at something we have to put in our best efforts. Maybe my timing was wrong, or the method needed improvement. I know for sure that I needed more support from the rest of the family in teaching him these things.


Even today, 10 years later, I see parents rushing in trying to make sure their kids excel at everything. Not too long ago, I wrote about a dad's valiant efforts to prevent boys facing defeat from a girl. I saw a parent fretting over their kid's presentation on the school's stage and watch them mouth the kid's lines in a play (isn't it amazing that they took the time to learn ALL the lines? I couldn't be arsed!) to prompt her to do better. What's wrong with that, you say? Well, teaching your kid to say her lines properly is one thing. Sitting in her face, prompting her for every effing line, with actions, while the play is in progress? I am sorry but this is stretching things a bit too far. Let her screw up a few lines for goodness' sake! Let her taste failure, disappointment. Because only then will she get the determination to do better the next time. And who knows? She might surprise you by remembering exactly how to say the lines. She won't gain confidence until she does it all on her own. Be there to help her. Teach her. Learn with her. But when the time comes, let her do what she has to do. Sit back and enjoy the show. Literally. If she messes up, fine! Make note of her mistakes and discuss them later. At home. NON accusingly.

It raises my hackles to see parents and teachers trying to make every kid feel special at any given event. "We all are winners for participating in this event". "There are no losers. Only winners". "You all are winners for making the effort". WTH??? I get it, I do, that kids should be encouraged for merely participating in an event. Winning ain't everything. But what about the poor winner (never thought I'd use the words "poor" and "winner" together) who put in extra efforts, who perhaps practised his/her butt off before the event? Don't put the losers down but at least show some appreciation for the winner(s)! It is this mentality of making everyone special that gets my goat. Yeah everyone is special. I am not denying that. But if someone made an ounce of extra effort and stood out among those special kids, please do make a little bit of song and dance about it. The poor sucker spent time and effort at getting better than other kids at something!

What I am afraid of is that these very kids, whom we are trying to help develop a healthy self esteem, will grow up to be over-confident brats with ginormous, inflated egos who think they can never lose because... well because they are specail! And when life serves them one of its lessons? When they lose out to someone a bit more deserving? Or even someone less deserving? (because that does happen) They will be devastated because failure will be an unkonwn territory for them. They wouldn't know how to overcome something they have never experienced or even dreamt about! THAT is why I think we parents owe it to our kids to let them taste a little bit of failure. We need to make our kids realize that life isn't always fair. Not everyone gets candy and a certificate at the end. And even if failure beats you down, you HAVE to get up. brush off your clothes and get back in the frigging fight!

And it isn't about only winning. It is also about learning from your mistakes. Improvement. If I step in and correct every mistake my child makes, how will she ever learn to check her own work and correct it if needed? At the event I wrote about in the beginning (play, parent mouthing lines), S forgot to bring along a printout of her lines for the play. I told her to figure out what to do. She said she'd ask her teacher if she could take another printout. They did have some time. I thought even if the teacher got upset at S for forgetting her lines, it would be a good lesson for her to learn. The teacher didn't get upset and just printed out the lines for her again (I guess she is more used to such things, being a fifth grade teacher). I think S did learn a little lesson. Two, maybe. One - to remember such things, and two - to figure out a solution instead of panicking.

All around me I see efforts being made to help kids succeed at everything. Nothing's wrong with that. My only grouse is that nobody is teaching them to lose gracefully. Unless you fail at something, you cannot learn to be graceful in the face of defeat. And unless you do so, you can't learn the WHOLE lesson that life has in store for you. If they fail, we rush in to heal their broken ego with kind words, telling them they are a winner for even trying. That winning or losing doesn't matter. All that matters is that one tried. All valid lessons in themselves, really. But not once do we tell them gently "Next time try a little harder and I am sure you'll get better at this thing." We are selling mediocricy so kids' feelings don't get hurt when they are 2nd or 3rd or 15th in the race. What is worse, we are not teaching them that more important than winning or trying is improving oneself. Doesn't matter that you were 12th in the race this time. If you practice, you might be 10th the next time. That will be an improvement. THAT is what matters.

Friday, July 31, 2009

God must be five years old

Only a five year old thinks seeing people get hurt is fun.
Only a five year old thinks seeing people fall and stumble is fun.
Only a five year old thinks piling muck on someone is fun.
Only a five year old thinks piling more muck on a mucky person is fun.
Only a five year old pokes you in the ribs and laughs when you grimace.


Only a five year old can repeatedly forgive you for hurting him/her.
Only a five year old doesn't demand respect and still helps you when you ask for help.
Only a five year old can love you unconditionally.

Yep. I think God IS a five year old!

Tuesday, June 09, 2009

With friends like this...

I got the much needed haircut this past weekend (yay!!!) I go all the way to New Jersey to get the darned haircut. I told GND my plans for the weekend in an email exchange on Friday. She asked me not to tell her if I decide to eat at Khaasiyat or Saravana Bhavan while I am in NJ. I did eat at Saravana Bhavan. Idli, Dosa and yummy Philter Kaapi. Well, since I am such a considerate friend, I won't tell her. 





I'll blog about it here instead.





And leave her a link.

Mwahahahahahaha!!!!!

Friday, June 05, 2009

Happieee... deeey

as you say it, my not-so-little-anymore little one! Or, in our words, Happy Birthday. 

You are two today. You are fun. You are active. You are headstrong. You are a pleasure to have around except when you decide to be utterly disagreeable to anything and everything. Then you want to have nothing to do with us, and we are only too happy to oblige. Then, when you have had some time to yourself, you revert to your happy, sunny self. Or maybe not. I can't believe how chilled out we have become as parents! Your tantrums in public places don't embarrass us, your screaming fests don't faze us and your occasional hunger strikes don't send us into panic mode. We know you will eat when you want to eat and that is fine by us. You go to sleep without any fuss (most of the days) by yourself and that is the best habit we think you have. And of course, we proudly accept all credits for that! You wake up happy and sometimes let us  grab some extra shuteye on weekends by playing quietly in your crib until one of us stirs. That consideration itself is a reward enough for all the tantrums you throw otherwise.

You have suddenly started speaking in 2-3 word sentences. You have started speaking clearly too, though I am trying my best to have you keep your baby language. Kakkay sure sounds way better than Thankyou, you know. And that reminds me - you are such a well mannered child at least when it comes to thanking people. You even say "kakkay" in your sleep when we cover you with your blanket on chilly nights. You just recently started saying "owwy" (sorry) when urged to do so, dropping all your reluctance and overcoming your ego, you little diva! And about 4 months ago you put my fears to rest when you stopped being in a constant competition with your sister. I used to worry that you two will grow apart emotionally due to the brattiness you constantly showed to and against your older sister. Now you seem to have accepted her as a part of the entire package :P

You like being independent and who are we to resist a blessing in disguise? Yes, it means you insist on buckling yourself into your highchair while we tap our feet impatiently. But it also means you clean up after yourself most of the times. Or help with the cleanup. And that you drink most of your milk without parental supervision and eat most of your food without us having to shovel it in your mouth. "Most" being the keyword here. I wouldn't mind feeding you the entire meal because, truth be told, that would be infinitely faster but I firmly believe in preparing my kids to be progressively independent. It is a good thing for both of us that you agree.

I loved the days when you started calling me "Mai". And I love how sweet "Didi" sounds coming from your mouth. I feel blessed when didi (older sister) replies in an equally sweet voice to your calls, no matter how busy, rushed or upset she is. I hope this love and bond between you two grows each day and stays long after we are gone.

You find it funny to run away when we are trying to take your picture. Or when we are trying to change your diaper. Or when you need a bath. In short - running away is GREAT FUN to you :) And you love gardening with us. It is another matter that gardening, to you, means picking up soil from one place and dumping at another, or poking fingers into leaves. Well, at least you don't make appetizers of the earthworms :P You love sneaking into your sister's room when she is away at school. I love how you pick one of her stuffed toys out of her ample stash and run out of the room waving it victoriously over your head. I also love how you put things back where you picked them up from if we ask you to "put it back". Even super-tempting knick-knacks you find in your sister's room.

There are way too many things you do, say and enjoy for me to list here. I'll just say that I am enjoying life with you. I am living in the moment. All of us are. We can't even begin to imagine what we did to pass our time before you came along. We can't remember who what we laughed at or spoke about. You have filled our lives with fun and laughter to the brim. We all love you darling. Happiee deeeey!

Wednesday, June 03, 2009

All it takes is a few words

She brought up an interesting point in this post. I have been meaning to write along similar lines ever since I lost my dad. This just brought that need to blog about my observations and feelings to the surface.

When Pa died, many friends and family rallied around us to provide support. Even strangers wrote to offer condolences. For that I will be eternally grateful. But many others chose to stay quiet. Many friends and relatives chose not to call me or my mom. Maybe it didn't occur to them, or they didn't know what to say. A childhood friend didn't visit me or mom for days. He came just a couple of days before I was to leave. Only one of J's cousins took the trouble to find my number and call me to offer his condolences. The rest, even though they knew my dad had expired suddenly, kept away. Even some close (so-called) family members haven't said even two words to me about it. Yet. That hurt me deeply. Still does. I have always maintained - don't keep in touch with me during good times, I'll still remember you and be your friend. Avoid calling me during tough times, when you KNOW I am going through them, you lose me. On the other hand - I will forget every wrong you have done me if you extend that helping hand or lend that listening ear in times of need. Selfish, I know. But that is how I am.

I have observed that we Indians (in particular) are experts at avoiding discussions about our loss. I needed to vent my feelings of loss. I needed someone to talk to. I desperately needed to cry and let it all out. But no one would let me. Anyway, thank God for J. He let me do all of the above. When I came back, I noticed that friends always paused for a second if I mentioned anything funny about my dad or the fun times we had when we were little, or even anything about his sudden demise. Maybe they took the time to figure out how to respond - laugh when it is certainly time to grieve?? Will I take an offence? Would they say something inappropriate by mistake? I did appreciate this thoughtfulness on their part but a part of me wanted for someone to come up and share their memories of my father. I wanted to feel that connection. I know it was too much ask of friends who probably had never dealt with this situation ( a friend losing a parent suddenly and tragically).

In the days following immediately after Pa's death, we (Ma, my brother, cousin, assorted uncles and aunts and visiting friends) would frequently bring up fond memories of Pa and laugh about them. Somehow it felt cathartic. It felt like we had lost him but the memories will be ours forever. 

This is something I have noticed - humor makes you heal faster (after a loss). In Jan 2006, when I had to undergo an MTP, I was devastated. I would cry all the way on my drive to office and back. I would cry all day IN office. I would cry myself to sleep oftentimes. I still feel a twinge on or around September 3rd - the would-have-been due date. Even after I have had another baby, I cannot forget the one I lost. I don't think any mother can. But slowly I started making occasional light comments. e.g. I told one friend what a total waste of labor pains it had been when the Tylenol I took didn't work and I could feel every contraction that was being brought on by the drugs given to induce a miscarriage. [Really - the contractions felt like labor pain. The only difference was that they were limited to a very small area compared to a full-term pregnant belly] It is then that I realized that I was getting over that loss a little bit. 

Now, even before MM wrote her post, I had figured out why people behaved the way they did. Loss makes them uncomfortable. It brings them face-to-face with their own possible loss. Or maybe they don't know how to comfort the grieving party. Or they are afraid they'd say or do something to hurt the feelings of the person suffering the loss. I don't always know what to say to the near and dear ones of someone who has passed away. But that doesn't stop me from picking up the phone. I recently lost my Bua. It was tough finding the words to talk to my phupha about it so I just cried with him over the phone. What I mean to say is - if someone you know has lost someone or suffered a misfortune, don't stay away even if you don't know what to say. Just be there. That will be enough. Or say how sorry you are for their loss. Or, if words fail you, send a card or an email. I know emails are considered rude but when I wrote about Pa's death, I received a number of emails from people I didn't even know. They just read my blog and took out the time to write a few lines. That gave me comfort and strength. Made me feel I was not alone. In tough times, I would take an email from you any day over your silence. Anything that shows me that you care.

MM wrote about miscarriages in particular. But her commenters added death of children to that list. And I am adding ANY kind of loss or misfortune. Because I have seen that people do hesitate in discussing loss. The day I announced my pregnancy (at another friend's baby shower - I was showing already) and mentioned that I conceived through IVF, a hush fell over the table. I don't blame anyone for that. People just aren't used to sharing such details. Infertility treatments, I assume, carry a stigma with them (from the way I have seen people react to the mention of them back home). I don't know why. Why anyone would object to, or turn their nose up at, a means of getting that sweet, cuddly baby when all else has failed, is beyond me. Maybe, going through the process has given me the required shamelessness. I still remember the silence at the other end of the line when I told a friend about my pregnancy over the phone and mentioned that the IVF procedure had taken a toll at me mentally and physically. Thankfully no one was insensitive enough to suggest that I hadn't done enough (like stand on my head?) to conceive or that I couldn't conceive because I had delayed getting pregnant. I would have bashed their head in.

When, after the first round of IUI, I conceived we rejoiced. And told our family. And then during the first ultrasound we found no heartbeat. We actually found nothing. There was a black void where the fetus should have been. The gestational sac was a black, disintegrating emptiness instead of being a round gray/black/white image of a peanut pounding away like a horse running on a wooden deck. I remember I had subconsciously realized that things were not right a day before. I woke up and realized, with a start, that I hadn't gotten up even once during the night time to go to the bathroom and that I hadn't been feeling dead tired for the last 2-3 days. My heart sank and then the fears were confirmed in the cold ultrasound room the next day. 

All I remember from those days now is the people who rallied around me. Who provided comfort through their words or actions. The HR Director of the company I used to work for, poked her head into my office one day and said "I admire your courage" (I was trying to work through the labor-like contractions that were induced by the drug for MTP. I took it on a Thursday, expected it to start working on Friday and be done with everything by Sunday. Didn't happen that way - I had to take another dose on Monday). What I mean to say is, the littlest of gestures during some one's tough times goes a long way. So, don't hesitate. Pick up the phone or reach out with that hug. 

When I finally conceived after the second IVF and we had confirmed that the fetus was viable at the 8 week ultrasound, we were still scared to celebrate. We didn't tell anyone for almost three months. But then I realized that even if this pregnancy failed, I would like to have celebrated it while it lasted. Because I WILL mourn it for the rest of my life if it failed. So J and I went out for  a movie and dinner. I wanted to shout out from the rooftops, but I was too superstitious after my previous loss. If I had to do it all over again, I'd tell close friends from the beginning. Because a hard-earned pregnancy, however short lived, deserves to be celebrated.

And remember humor? I used it throughout this pregnancy. It helped keep me sane otherwise I would have died of worry. I told people I had to undergo IVF because we had been diagnosed with idiopathic infertility - that is when idiots (like us) who already have a child, can't conceive (because they forgot what to do!) I demonstrated how I used to take my IVF shots (Close eyes, Point, JAB!) because, even after 300+ IVF shots I gave myself during two IVF cycles, I was (and am) still scared of needles. I used to joke that I would make a lousy junkie. All this (and J and support of friends and family) did help me get through all that. But most of all, through ALL my losses and misfortunes, the thing that has carried me is my friends and their support, J and HIS support and love and support from my family. 

So don't hesitate - do call and say "I am SO sorry for your loss" if a friend needs to hear it. I know, I still hold a grudge against some people who didn't, and then (4 months) later tried to cover it up by saying something lame like "oh yes - I heard about your dad. Sorry, huh?!" in the middle of some other conversation. Or "I would have called you but I didn't have your number". The same person magically found our number two weeks ago when she needed us and called us at midnight. DUDE!! At least show some compassion by either saying it sincerely or keep your trap shut! Oh well. At least they are better than people who didn't call me, not even on Diwali which was SUPER tough for me emotionally, and then complained that I didn't call them on Diwali or Hindu New Year. Yeah riiiiiight!! I am SO sorry for being so rude. NOT! Why am I writing all this here? Because it is my blog? To finally get rid of the hurt that comment caused.

I know I have rambled. I won't apologize for it. I needed all this to come out. I would have loved it if I could make a coherent and sensible post out of it but oh well!!

Tuesday, June 02, 2009

Que Sera Sera, what will be will be.

She wasn't the svelte nymphet anymore. Turned out more "headstrong" than he ever imagined.

 

She’d had her dreams of finding another family shattered too, and how! Overcame the bitterness with great difficulty.

 

They fought bitterly, made up tenderly - even after so many years. They’d faced losses and celebrated triumphs. Together.

 

The Gods weren't sniggering anymore.

Saturday, May 30, 2009

The future's not ours to see: 55 word fiction

She looked up at him adoringly as he tied on the Mangalsutra. She felt blessed to be marrying into such a loving family. She wasn't losing her family, she was gaining another one. She couldn't believe her luck.

The Gods above sniggered. She was in for a surprise too! This was just too much fun!

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Whatever will be, will be: 55 word fiction

He looked at her fondly as he leaned forward and tied the mangalsutra around her neck. Such a charming, loving and lovely partner. She would fit right into his family. He beamed proudly at his fine choice of a girl. She smiled back.

 

The Gods above sniggered. Boy, was he in for a BIG surprise!!

What do you do with the leftover milk in your cereal bowl once the cereal is finished?

If you had a top that was too short to cover both - your cleavage and your midriff - what would you do?