How to confuse the heck out of your parents

M: Mommy, do you know what is the smallest number?
Me: No. What?
M: 1!
Me: How about 0? Isn't zero the smallest number? ( Did not want to confuse her with negative numbers)
M: No!
Me: Think about it. If you have 1 chocolate and I have 0, who has more chocolates?
M: (Thinks for a moment) Didi!!
Me: (not giving up) If you have one chocolate and didi has zero, who would have more chocolates?
M: (thinking harder) Daddy!
Me: How so?
M: I would want daddy to have 20 chocolates because then I can have all his chocolates!

Who can refute that logic??!

Demand and supply

Me: M, how much do you love me?
M: (with wide eyes and a BIG smile) 20 million!!
Me: Really?? Then you have to give me 20 million kisses RIGHT NOW!!
M: You know what? Today I love you only one million.
Runs away.

The day mommy was left speechless

M: Mommy, why do we have fingers?

Me: To grab things, to tickle someone.

M: Why do we have hands?

Me: To garb things, to grab mommies and daddies and big sisters.

M: Why do we have arms?

Me: To hug mommies, daddies and sisters.

M: And brothers?
Me: Yes. And grandparents and friends.

M: And BOYS!

Me: ................................

Put your listening ears on, mommy!

Just yesterday M came up to me and said - VERY quietly - "Mommy, I am not lellin at you, I am speaking nicely. I want you to speak nicely to me too. Don't lell at me, okay??"

!!!!!!!!!!! 

(I wasn't even "lelling"!! *whine*)

Note: "lelling"=yelling.