Best Laid Plans

Mad Momma asked "Are you where you planned to be?" I've been thinking since. Not if I am where I planned to be. I know where I am. I've been thinking about doing this post ever since. When I first set up this blog, I chose my blogger ID "GettingThereNow" for certain reasons. And I planned on doing a post on why I chose it some time in the future. I think that time is now.

Well, I always knew I wanted to be financially independent and planned on getting a job as soon as I finished my Master's. Then when J and I decided to spend our lives together, he mentioned that his dad was dead against daughters in law working outside of home. Plan no. 1 crashed! I wasn't one to be held back so I decided if I couldn't just stay at home and I did want to marry J, then I could at least run my own business. J said that should be fine with his parents. (Well, he should have known better. :P)For two years after finishing my studies, I worked at a small coaching & software development institute because I figured I'd get experience in all aspects of running a business that way. And I did. When I got married and finally started my own coaching institute (even though I wanted to be in software development instead), everything was well in the beginning and I even got a lot of help from my MIL in balancing my work and home responsibilities. I guess my in-laws figured it was some temporary hobby of mine and once I tired of it, I would just go back to my "main" responsibilities i.e. house chores. When it became obvious that I took it seriously, MIL started to resent it even though I never neglected my duties towards the house and family. But stubborn that I am, I just persevered and kept going with my classes.

I had big plans for this business of mine. I also wanted to get into the field of software development and the time was right because many small businesses were beginning to realize that they needed to computerize their systems. I told J I wanted to develop software more than teach so he tried to find a project for us to work on and did find one. A school wanted him to develop a software for them to maintain all their student records. J asked me if I wanted to do it and I jumped at the opportunity. But you can't develop software out of thin air. You have to gather requirements and for that you need to sit down with the client to get an idea about what they need and want out of the project. "Not so fast!" said FIL. No DIL of mine will ever step out of the house to go to a client's site. Plan 2 crashed.

I swallowed the bitter frustration and put all my energy into my classes. Now I figured I'd get government accreditation for a few courses and move my business to a proper site - till now I was running the business out of my home. We had set up one hall for classes with computers for lab work. Even though I was running the classes out of home, I tried to keep it as professional as I could. That meant I finished all house chores before classes started and never went in during the classes. I wanted it to be more professional than just some housewife giving tuitions to a bunch of kids. And it was. I had batches running from 7:30 in the morning till 5:30 in the evening with just three 15 minute breaks. Each batch had at least 4 and maximum 8 students. Students were coming to me just by word of mouth. I never had to advertise. Then J got an offer from a company that trained people and sent them to the US on projects. So my plan for a government accredited institute flew out the window.

Then we planned to have a baby before leaving for the US. I must say that was the only thing that went according to plan in all those years after getting married. And I thank God for that! S came into our lives within a year. I wanted very little age difference between my kids. 2.5 years at the most. Because I figured that way they'd grow up as best buddies. Plan number 4 went off-track this time. After this I stopped counting.

I was so depressed after having S that initially I put off the planning for second baby myself. I still think that was a smart decision. When S was about 3.5 years old, I decided I was well enough to try for another baby so we started trying. Nothing. 4 long years of nothing. That is another part of my life that I have already discussed in my earlier posts.

When S was a year old, I decided it was time for me to go back to work. That is how I and J had planned it - I'd stay at home for a year and then go back to work. I found a company that agreed to sponsor my H1B visa. Sent them all my papers in January of 2000. I kept following up with my account manager and he kept reassuring me that everything was going smoothly. Then, in April I called him to ask the status of my visa application and he informed that he had "forgotten" to file my application. That is one thing I still can't wrap my mind around - how can someone "forget" to do their job? Anyway, he filed my papers then and I finally got my work visa in October that year. I needed to get my papers stamped and since we were visiting India in November, I got them stamped at the Mumbai consulate. Came back in December, arranged for a daycare for S and by February beginning I was all set to start looking for a job. The IT bubble burst right around that time and there were no more jobs. Another plan goes poof! I kept looking for a job but after September 11th, I really gave up hope of ever finding a job until our green card came through because companies weren't hiring any H1B holders anymore.

In beginning of the next year (2003) I decided that if I ever wanted to return to the job market, it wasn't going to happen on my current skill set. So I decided to upgrade it. In fact, I decided to change fields completely. I switched from software development to Networking. Went back to school, earned a certification and found an internship through my college co-op in October 2004. In February/March 2005 my brother introduced me to blogging and I opened this blog. At that time, I had a part time job, our green-card processing was moving along at a good pace and I was beginning to feel that things were looking up again. I felt I was slowly getting where I wanted to be. Hence the blogger ID - Gettingtherenow.

I am still not where I want to be in my chosen profession. I have a long way to go. But I am sure I will get there. Even if I have to go back to college with my daughters :D It is like my wish list just reached God and he is fulfilling each wish one by one. Job - Check. House - Check. Baby - Check. Career advancement is next. I am finally getting there now.