In a recent post I mentioned that we have been looking at other daycares and that we like a particular one. We had made up our minds to send M there after two weeks (we wanted to extend the courtesy of a two week notice to the current daycare). I would have gone there and paid the registration fees if I had the time. I was worried that all their spots will fill up and we will miss out on a golden opportunity. Even though the last time I spoke with them they told me they had 6 open spots. Yes, I am impatient like that. But I do have some sense - really I do! And what I lack in that department, is made up for by J. He has loads of it! So that sense directed us to think, think and think before we gave the current daycare the two weeks' notice. And think we did.
We finally decided today that we are not moving M to the new daycare. Even though that daycare is far better as far as facilities, programs and location is concerned. And we are sure their care-providers are all very nice and gentle. They seemed that way when I met them during my visit. So, if this daycare is better in every aspect than the current one, then why aren't we sending M there? Because her current care-providers really, really care for her. What they lack in facilities, they make up for in the "love" department. M's face lights up when she sees them in the morning. They care enough to talk to us for as long as necessary to give us "M updates". They remember to call me and update on her condition if I ask them to. Now, in our opinion, no program, no facility, no gym can compete with that. I just hope we made the right decision. We WILL send M to the other daycare when she is ready to move to the next level (in about 4-6 months, or hopefully before that) because her care providers will change after that anyway. She can go to the next level as soon as she is weaned off of the bottle and can walk. Hopefully the other daycare will still have openings then.
What do you all think? Are we making a mistake? Frank opinions, please!
IMHO no mistake at all. What matters most is baby M's happiness.
ReplyDelete"M's face lights up when she sees them."
ReplyDeleteThat's a big, big factor to take into consideration. Also the time that they make to talk to you.
Keep her where she is, because it can be pretty traumatic for a little baby to change carers. As far as she is concerned, those people are taking your place in your absence.
The only valid reason I can think of in favour of changing would be if the present daycare were deficient in something important: safety or good hygienic practices. If the present daycare is falling short in any way in those 2 departments and, supposing, for arguments' sake, they're not rectifying it, then it would be a good reason to move her. Love or no love.
But if they're fine as far as most of the important things are concerned, let her be.
if she's happy i wouldnt shift her even after this. other than you, this is the one constant in her life... why change it? you're not *unhappy* with current one...so why were you moving, sorry?
ReplyDeleteNo, no mistake at all. As long as baby's happy, of course!
ReplyDeleteAnd hey Cee Kay, there's a tag waiting for you at my place! I know you must be very busy, but whenever you've some time... :-)
I know you are looking for someone to say you're doing the wrong thing...but unfortunately not! I have two girls 6 and 3, and I've tried every possible option... staying home - home daycare - nanny - nanny share - posh daycare - mediocre-looking daycare (excellent teachers). Unfortunately, we found the best in the last! For the past 3 years, we've stayed with the so-so looking daycare. The teachers are great and like you said do not mind talking to us forever, the crowd is cosmopolitan, and we're overall really happy. The learning part will always come to them when the time is right, which boils down to the individual teacher anyways.
ReplyDeleteLong story short, stay where you are.
RJ: That’s what we are thinking right now. But in the longer run, hygiene and security (which the other daycare provides better) do matter, no? Hence, my dilemma.
ReplyDeleteMummyjaan: The current daycare IS slightly deficient in hygiene and their doors are always open which presents a potential security risk – especially with older kids. For now, security risk isn’t that great for M because she isn’t even crawling. Same goes for hygiene – the risk increases when they start crawling AND teething at the same time(which, looks like M is going to do) because then they put their dirty hands in their mouths.
MM: As for why we want to move her even later, we are not happy with the current daycare. We are staying only because we like the current care providers so when she changes rooms, that factor goes away too. When we first joined this daycare, we always intended to eventually move her because of these factors so I had already registered her at two more daycares and she is on a waiting list there. As I said in my previous post (Sunshine state), the other daycare provides better security (an important issue here) and hygiene. Also presence of a gym is super-important for us because here, due to the weather, children are indoor-bound for a good part of 6 months (and there is frequent rain during the rest of the six months). A gym ensures they get their dose of daily activity. This is not an issue now since M is small and not even crawling, but when she starts walking and gets more active, it does become a big deciding factor for us. I understand your argument about the constant factor, but we will move her during a vacation week anyway so we can gradually increase her time there (pick her up early a few days and gradually move her to full days) so that the transition becomes easier. One more convenience factor that we are looking for is that the new daycare opens till 6 while the current one closes at 5:30. That half hour difference will make a big difference for J who is currently going crazy running between the two kids and the older one’s extra-curricular classes.
Whew!! Shoulda made this a post, no? :P
Devaki: Thanks for the confirmation : ) Will check out the tag soon. Thanks for it in advance.
Girl Next Door: I was actually hoping to hear from someone like you who can give me an input from experience point of view. I agree that learning is not important (for us, not at all frankly) because it comes at its own pace. The new daycare does have a good staff too and I have the rest of the reasons lined up as well (see my reply to Mad momma’s comment above) :D We are not looking for a “good looking” daycare anyway (the other one isn’t any more glamorous either and isn't too upscale). But yes, the current care-providers are very loving and they are the only reason we are staying here. And when we do leave, I plan on not burning any bridges so we can come back if we need to :P Thanks for dropping by, BTW!
Ok, I'm back...
ReplyDeleteYou're right that every half an hour makes a difference. 5.30 seems awfully early to close!
I know I'm not giving you the best answer, but here's one - whatever decision you take, it eventually works out. If it doesn't, you'll find another way out (like we did after all those attempts). Trust your instincts and do what you think is best!
GND: You are right. Jab okhli mein sar diya to moosalon se kya darna, right? :D
ReplyDeleteCertainly you are not making any mistake. This is the most wise step you both have taken, as at this age you should send her to the day care where dear M feels happy as she is familiar to the faces there. hame to apane bachche ko khush dekhana hai.
ReplyDeleteAt this age, all M needs is love, not so much play equipment. Good decision, I say.
ReplyDeleteThat was a rhetorical question, right? Can there be any doubt that you've made absolutely the right choice? Especially at M's age and probably for all young kids, I think it's the emotional care that matters much more than snazzy, physical stuff a lot of these playschools and day-care centres invest in...
ReplyDeleteyou know, I beg to differ. Yes, they really care for M. But then she gets attached to them and it becomes all the more difficult for you to shift her to another daycare, when she starts putting stuff in her mouth and can run out of the door, you know...shift her, if you are even one percent unsure of the current one. Just my 2 cents...LOL.
ReplyDeleteVinod: Thanks for the vote of confidence, Pa! :D
ReplyDeleteAmuser: True, too true! (love, not play equipment)
Rohini: Really, it was an honest question when I wrote the post because I was so unsure if we had taken the right decision. Then, as comments started coming in, I slowly became aware that I do know precisely what my own thoughts on this situation are (especially after I replied to Mummyjaan, Mad Momma and Girl Next Door’s comments). So now it seems like a rhetorical question but at that time it was not! Turns out that this post and the commenters became my sounding board.
Kiran: You are right in that. But she WILL be changing providers as soon as she starts walking and is weaned off the bottle. Then she will be sent to the “Toddlers” room. That is when we are planning to switch daycares now as it is just the current providers we like (OK – love). And she is a social animal. Really! I think she will adjust quickly – it is just the parents who are suffering from sleepless nights over this :P (In fact, only the mother)
my 2 cents too!!
ReplyDeleteIf she is happy here... you are absolutely right! Love she gets here from the caregivers weighs far more than any programs/facility/gym! Plus, at this age, the really only need good care.
I totally agree with you on moving her when she is ready to move on to the next room. That way, you save poor little soul from having to adjust twice.
You've got my stamp of approval. :-) If that counts for anything at all.
~AP
ps: and this is a mother who has two kids in the daycare here in US. So I know it ALL and been thru it ALL. :-)
Unmana: Didn't mean to forget you. Sorry! Thanks. I just picked this profile "off the shelf" and decided not to tweak with it as I always mess up a profile that way. I am getting a little ticked off you know - I can't get the "Email this post" and the "links" parts to work. "Email" link used to work and I suddenly lost it. Boo Hoo!!
ReplyDeleteAP: Hearing from parents who have similar experience to guide you helps a lot! Thanks for the stamp of approval :D It does count, believe me!
no mistake tehre at all.. a baby needs love, not flashcards :) All that matters is that she is happy, well cared for and you are happy with the love and care. At this age..babies learn through bonding.
ReplyDeletegood thinking.. whats important is M feels secure, well cared for and happy!!
ReplyDeletetagged!
ReplyDeleteHappy baby-
ReplyDeleteHappy parents.. she is happy here..let her stay here..till she is ready for the next step!
You guys are doing good :)
Trishna, Dotmom, Preethi: Thanks. Feels reassuring to know many others think like we do.
ReplyDeleteDotmom: Thanks for the tag. Already did it. Will post it today.
Sorry for the late response...no amount of facilities will ever make up for a care provider than genuinely cares for your child. And in case you didn't know day care staff turnover at a pretty high rate. You did the right thing.
ReplyDelete