Ro tagged me to write about the little ironies of motherhood. I'll comply. Only, I'd like to register a teeny-tiny objection about the term "ironies" at the very beginning of this post. Ironies? I don't think so. I think these are conspiracies against mothers. The seemingly innocent babies are conspiring against the poor mommies so that they don't get a single shut-eye, can't read a single sentence of ANY book and can't even go to the loo in peace. Don't agree with me? Read on!
1. The kids are busy watching the idiot box, or you are getting ready to go somewhere and the kids are ALL READY, waiting for you outside the house. You slip into the bathroom for that one quick "business" trip and the moment you sit down on the throne the door-banging sessions begin!
2. You tell you friends proudly about how junior has started going poo-poo in the pot and the next day you have a major clean-up operation on your hands. Or you tell you friend she is a good eater and she starts picking out the peas, the tomatoes, the meat the bread... Same goes for the boasts of "Oh she sleeps through" the night" or "She stays up ALL night". The little darlings make sure you are proven a liar in everyone's eyes. Again, and again, and AGAIN!
3. You spend the first 18 years swearing you will kick them out the door as soon as they hit 18 and then the rest of them hoping they'd come back, even if for a week.
4. You are not a homebody. You CANNOT be a stay-at-home mom - it'll kill you! The first day back to work, away from the baby, kills you.
5. You can't wait till you can finish your sentences before being interrupted by yet another "mommy...". When the time comes, your ears strain to hear if they have been calling your name, leaving sentences hanging half-finished in the air.
6. You yell at them, telling them to stop screaming.
7. You mourn the demise of romantic dinners out and then spend an entire dinner date talking about what junior must be doing right now, with the baby sitter.
8. You, who couldn't function without an 8-hour sleep, now buzz around on 4.5 hours' worth. And keep your composure. And are still sweet. You even smile occasionally!
9. You never imagined life with kids. Kept your focus on the straight and narrow path of "life ambitions" and "goals". Now you can't imagine life without them. You don't remember what you filled your days with, before they came along.
10. The more you love them, the more love you have for them.
Ain't life strange??
oh so true. How about when you tell they doctor they have been perfectly fine during their wellness check and they fall sick the very next day? :(
ReplyDeleteVery nice Cee. Loved and agreed with every one :)
ReplyDeleteIt so true and so well written.I couldn't agree with you more
ReplyDeleteLoved it. Perfect, just my way too.
ReplyDeleteWah Wah .... how apt !
ReplyDelete"You yell at them, telling them to stop screaming." - Thats the scene is our house every single day :(
So true. Enjoyed reading
ReplyDeleteHow about... you tell yourself you would never have gotten into this mommying business if u had known what it involved. Then you do it all over again
There...so that's a universal story, isn't it! I've been nodding my head (up-down) vigorously from points 1 to 10. Happy I'm not alone in this "scheme" of things:)
ReplyDeleteAwesome list :)
ReplyDeleteSo true :)
Nothing beats banging the door. it literally throws you off your throne..
ReplyDeleteSands: Or when you take them to the doctor's because they are sick and they bounce off the walls there? :D
ReplyDeleteRo: Thanks :)
BK Chowla: Thanks :D
Sumana: Thanks a bunch :)
CA: We get told "Don't yell at me Mamma/dadda! Why you yell at me??" quite sternly :D
ReplyDeleteArundhati: So SO true!!
RGB: LOL! Yeah you are not alone. Share yours too please :)
Chatterbox: Thanks :)
ReplyDeleteLife: LOL!!! True! The little one has even learnt to open the latch and now comes in insisting "I will help you mamma" :D:D:D
How about this?
ReplyDeleteThey have to use the potty only when mommy sits down to eat :(
Been at the receiving end so many times :(
Awesome list....can relate to all, especially 6 and 7! But not 8, I am a demon without my 8 hrs beauty sleep. Something wrong with my mommy-wiring :(
ReplyDelete@Lavanya: Yes, yes! Just as I sink gratefully in front of my dinner, I have to go wash a bum. Mercy,please, mercy!
Lavanya: LOL! Yes I'd forgotten about that one. M is very independent so 8 times out of 10 she does not want us helping her in the bathroom. That's why I didn't remember :)
ReplyDeleteStarry - LOL @ "not 8". I hope it stays that way. I have found out, the tough way, that lack of sleep is very damaging to things other than one's beauty as well - like health. My blood pressure behaves better if I get enough rest. I remember my blood sugar used to surge as well (due to lack of sleep/rest), when I was going through Gestational Diabetes.
ReplyDeleteCee, about #5... Erma Bombeck had a chapter in the middle of a book that still haunts me. About how her kids would do this or that and she'd holler, "Why don't you grow up!" and now as she walks through a silent house, the silence tells her, "I did."
ReplyDeleteExcuse the paraphrasing. She puts it much better.
I know what she means :( I am already dreading the time when S will go to college. That will mean the beginning of the nest getting empty. It is the biggest irony of parenthood Sue - if you do a good job, you are left alone in the end. If you did a crappy job, they keep coming back.
ReplyDeleteDear Cee Kay,
ReplyDeleteI’ve been following your blog and have noticed you write about world issues and your family. Your blogs are very interesting to read.
The reason I'm leaving you a comment is that I'm the intern for StageofLife.com, and I am looking for bloggers who might be interested in guest writing on our site. Could we feature you? We work with talented writers and bloggers to build a network of stories, crossing all stages of life, that will help make the world a better place, and I think our readers would gain a lot from your life perspective.
Thank you in advance for your time and consideration and I look forward to hearing from you if you are interested. My email is megan.colyer@stageoflife.com. Thanks!
Megan