When the going gets tough.....

Today, while watching a program on TV I somehow began thinking about how adverse situations, tragedies, difficulties reshape our entire being. Some people break apart, some come out stronger. No one goes unscathed! And then, I began thinking about my daughter. She is 6 years old - will be six and a half in April end. She started losing her hair last year, sometime in January or February. She had very thick hair and it took us a long time (about 4-5 months) to realize what was going on. She had a condition called "Alopecia Areata". Its an auto-immune condition, where a person's own immune system starts attacking their hair follicle. Later last year, around October, she lost almost all her hair. Earlier this year, she started losing hair from other parts of her body like legs and arms. We were devastated. The only thing that helped us keep our wits together and maintain composure was the thought that if we lose control how will it affect her? Now she is still fighting it, but has gotten most of her hair back. The thing that amazes me the most is my daughter's resilience. Throughout this ordeal, she hasn't once cried about it, refused covering up her head when I offered her to buy some pretty hats sayig "It really doesn't bother me" and has really shown a courage that has kept US going. About two weeks back, she and I were talking about how God sends difficulties only to those who can handle them. It was then, almost 7 months after we first knew what was going on, she said to me "But mommy, why did God have to send this problem to me? " It broke my heart but I managed to say "Because He knew you were strong enough to get through it". In my mind I was screaming "Yes, WHY HER?????". But my daughter accepted that explanation calmly. Sometimes I wonder if she is more mature than I am. Sometimes I KNOW that she is :P

All my life, I have clinged to one mantra that has taken me through many a rough times - "When the going gets tough, the tough get going". I guess my daughter learnt that all on her own. Sometimes, being a die-hard optimist, I feel it has been a valuable lesson (rather a collection of lessons) for all of us. The first one that my daughter learnt was - Looks aren't everything. She is still beautiful to us, all her friends still love her and she is still healthy. Second, we have truly learnt to look at the glass as half full. Instead of complaining about the problems she has, we focus on the fact that since her immune system is in an overdrive, she hasn't came down with any of the typical infections that kids bring home from school in over 8 months! There are other lessons which routinely surface but none come to my mind immediately.

I once asked God - "Why her? She is so young!!". Now I thank Him for also giving her the strength to deal with it. (I still ask "Why her..."). I hope one day we will be able to look back upon all this and wonder "How the heck did we get through such difficult times?" . I am sure of one thing. We WILL. Get through, I mean.